Being the gentleman that he is, hubby played taxi and chief advisor. We reached the spot and tried to see a way in that hopefully wouldn’t involve falls, trips or slips! Thankfully there was a well worn path most of the way. We slowly and carefully crossed the grass and rocks until we were beside the pool we’d chosen for our dip.
I was a bit excited but also nervous. The pool looked very inviting, but getting in would involve manoeuvring down a couple of ledges and then dropping into deep water. It was very different to the slow wade in I’m used to from a beach. Add to that, the thought of not being able to touch the bottom and the prospect of trying to get back out, and my nerves started to kick in a bit more.
The sight of the calm, clear water was too inviting to allow anxiety to remain however, and determination started to kick in. I could do this, I knew I could. My wonderfully fearless friend went in first as always! She talked through each stage, giving me hints and tips. Hubby stood slightly higher up and also provided insights into the easiest route. Both were wonderfully supportive but neither rushed me or instructed me. Just helpful suggestions and tips.
I got myself sitting on the first ledge, with my feet and lower legs in the water. After a few minutes I lowered myself down onto the next ledge. I sat there for another few minutes, getting used to the water temperature. As always with the North Atlantic, it was cold, and I was conscious I usually get a much slower immersion.
I didn’t sit for too long before I became buoyed by my buddy…….. she was straight in and swimming across the pool, to the rocky wall at the other side. I slowly followed her lead and eased myself into the water. It was cold but we’ve dipped in far worse. The water was deeper than we’re used to, with no chance of touching the bottom, but there were plenty of rocky grip points along the sides of the pool.
I relaxed and was taken back to childhood……. a memory of swimming in a pool just like this one, only smaller. It was at the bottom of someone’s garden. I don’t know whose. My mum had passed away a short time before, so I would’ve been about 5 years old, and someone had taken my sister and I to a house that had a deep rock pool, just like this one, at the bottom of the back garden. I don’t remember who took us there, or where it was, but I do remember that pool somewhere in Scotland. Somewhat bizarrely, I also remember a girl of about 18 or 19 years of age, playing a keyboard in the house.
As I crossed the rock pool this morning I felt peace wash over me with each movement I took through the water. With relative ease, I swam to the other side of the rock pool. As I reached it, my epic sea sister was climbing out and preparing for a jump back into the deep pool. I watched her and admired her courage. I wasn’t tempted to try it though: I didn’t think I’d be able to get out of the pool, never mind have the nerve to jump back in!!
We swam back to the other side and she was out and getting dressed by the time I’d very ungraciously hauled myself onto the lower ledge. Bum shuffling like a baby learning to crawl, I managed to get out of the pool. As I giggled and indulged in some self praise at my ability to achieve my goal, another small group of women appeared. The three of them had clearly done this before……….. they headed straight to the far end of the pool and easily walked down a slope and slowly entered the water. We laughed at our ability to pick the hardest route in and out of the rock pool, whilst continuing to praise ourselves for our strength!
Today was a good day. A year ago I wouldn’t have had the strength or the confidence to get myself in and out of that pool, never mind swim across it and back again. Today I did so, safe in the knowledge that I had the ability and had a Support Team on hand should any disasters strike. It wasn’t pretty, but I did it! And more importantly, I thoroughly enjoyed it. I left that deep pool, full of daydreams of childhood and a confidence in how far I’ve come since that life changing grand mal seizure four and a half years ago. Life is good.
Living with…..
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