I wish that.....

“I wish that

I knew what I know now

When I was younger”

Ooh la la by The Faces

I just heard this song and it got me thinking. Do I? Do I wish I’d known what was ahead and the lessons a twist of fate has taught me? 

I was once basically asked this at a promotion interview. It went something like this......

Interviewer: If you could go back to your first day as a Trainee Analyst what would you do differently and why?

Me: *looks confused and tries to think* Well, that depends. Am I going back knowing what I know now? Or am I going back the same way I was then? Hmmm, that’s a tough one. If I go back the way I was then, I wouldn’t change anything because I wouldn’t know any different...... However, I can’t go back knowing what I know now, because if I hadn’t done things the way I did them then I wouldn’t  have learnt anything and wouldn’t know there was a better way. Erm. I’m confused. What exactly do you mean??

Interviewer: *clears his throat* Uh, yes, I see what you’re saying. That was a stupid question. Ignore I asked it. Let’s move on.

Somehow, I managed to get the promotion on that occasion! I still feel the same way about hindsight. Would I have lived my life differently prior to diagnosis if I’d known what was ahead? No, I don’t think I would. I don’t think I ever lived a terrible life to begin with. And lessons come through experience. You have to mess up or have something traumatic happen to truly make you who you are. 

In conclusion, I’m glad I didn’t know what I know now when I was younger. I think.... Xx