Taking a bit more back 💪🏻

I’ve had a pretty rotten few days....... down with the lurgy. Unfortunately I find now that a cold/flu just knocks me for six and can very quickly drag my mood with it. So I’ve been pretty miserable all round.

As ever, I craved some Vitamin Sea. Yesterday we walked the dog by the sea and it definitely helped. But by this morning I was as miserable as yesterday morning again. Why are colds and flus are always worse in the morning and at night? It doesn’t help that I recently had confirmation I’m menopausal. Hubby pointed out “It’s not much wonder when you look at what your poor body’s been through the past few years honey”....to which I snapped “Aye, look what my body’s been through! I’ve had enough ffs!! I could do with getting a break!” This morning I felt horribly sorry for myself. I was tired and felt old for my years. There were a few half hearted self pity tears

I had another slow start but was more determined than ever to get more fresh air. I knew sea swimming would be pushing it a bit so we went for another walk with the dog. A longer one this time. It was wonderful. The sea air is restorative, of that I’m quite sure. 

On our return home, I decided to try something else. My Sunday ritual was always to have a bath in the afternoon when hubby was watching football. I haven’t been able to do that for a long time...... muscle wastage and aches and pains from treatment made it a challenge to get in and out safely, even with help. 

Our bath doesn’t have handles on the sides........ I would get crouched down but then not be able to sit down. It was a case of just crashing, sending water sploshing all over the floor and anything else in the vicinity. The last time I tried it I compared myself to King Fu Panda........ ska doooooosh!! I then managed to find myself unable to get out. I think I blogged about that experience previously......funny but a bit depressing too.

I’ve slowly been getting stronger and hubby bought me some lovely Lush goodies as a Christmas present for when I felt like trying again. Today was that day....... 

In went one foot. In went the other foot. Deep breaths and words of encouragement from hubby. I crouched as much as I physically could before feeling like my knees would snap...... my wonderful husband put his hands firmly on my back and gave me kind instructions. Before we knew it I was in!! And crying. It felt amazing and, similar to driving again, it’s symbolic of me getting stronger and getting more of myself back.

 It might not have been the most elegant entry but the water was still in the tub. I shed a few joyful tears as hubby praised me (before heading back to the football!) I lay back in the pink water in delight. Bliss.  I had my Bluetooth speaker and the company of some happy music. The warm, bubbly water felt wonderful. After a while I decided I should try and get out. My wonderful husband yet again paused the football to come and help. It was a special sight I’m sure....... I’m definitely no Cleopatra.....

When I got out I spent time massaging thick, sweet smelling moisturising butter into my skin....... I used to do this every week and it feels so good to do it after a nice hot bath. 

It’s a small things but I know the girls reading this will understand. I’ve never been high maintenance but I don’t know any female who doesn’t enjoy having nice, soft skin. Plus I smell delicious! I shower every morning so I’m pretty confident I never smell bad, but I think it’s fair to say I smell particularly good tonight! I’m girlified. And I’m not nearly as miserable as I was this morning.

Small things but symbolic accomplishments. Living with.... xxx