It really only took a few days out of hospital to start feeling re-energised. By the time I was home a week, I felt better than I have in over a year! I’m being sensible about things, but I also want to enjoy the high spirits when I have them!
I had a busy Saturday; I reckon I managed to spend almost 2 months wages in one day...... yikes! But hey, we didn’t over extend and sofas for both the front and back rooms were totally justified!! And as for lunch in the Wine Bar?? Haven’t been able to do that since the end of 2016, and boy it tasted good!! It’s so good to actually be able to enjoy food again. Now that I’m not on the drug that was making me toxic, I have my appetite back, can actually taste food, and am not afraid to eat! I’m still down to 7 stone 4, but I suspect this is a very temporary issue now!! Although I’m trying to be measured about food too - I might’ve spent two months wages in one day...... eating 2 months food in one day may be a bad idea!
I also appear to have become a master of online shopping......! There’s just
So
Much
Stuff
!!!!
I don’t think I was ever a particularly materialistic person..... I don’t need the best of the best and have no interest in ‘keeping up with the Jones’’, but I’ll admit to thoroughly enjoying spontaneous shopping sprees of late! Oftentimes it can be random gifts for others too. A scary experience can make you very grateful to those who’ve shown you kindness, plus it’s allows you empathy with others and a better understanding of things that might help someone else in a bad place. And then there’s the wedding..........!!
My sister is getting married in May. In her usual, generous way, she has made it all about others and is holding it locally (despite living in England) to accommodate me and our dad. The guest list is basically split 3 ways. Initially I was uncomfortable about that....... she’s given up so much of her time to me this past year, the last thing I wanted was for her wedding day to become about me, rather than about her. I thought I’d be the worst Matron of Honour ever, due to my inability to drive and my dodgy memory. Amazing what you can do when you set your mind to it!! A phone, the internet and notebook to write everything in, combined with practically a free reign to encourage my inner quirkiness has led me into a flurry of wedding planner madness........ and I’m loving every second of it!! My sister is the best! She’s selflessly allowed her big day to become about helping me, thanking others and has given our whole family plus some close friends a happy event to look forward to.
As ever, friends continue to call, visit and message. My new found energy is, I hope, also healing some of the trauma experienced by those unfortunate enough to see me at my worst in hospital.
Life is good. So I’m letting it be good. I’m not sitting around, waiting for another disaster. I’m enjoying how I feel but keeping half a lid on it........ new sofas, meals out and quirky weddings......... but no Round the World cruises or mad house moves! Xxx
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