The past few days, however, have been fairly relaxed. I've had seaside walks, relaxation time and even a visit to a chapel. I wasn't raised catholic..... I wasn't particularly raised anything. However, I do find there's something very calming and relaxing about a chapel. It's almost like a form of meditation to just sit in silence, relaxing your shoulders, breathing deeply and taking a moment.
The sea air is definitely restorative too! There's nothing quite like it. Again, calming and relaxing. Plus it leaves you tired...... meaning I'm confident of sleeping well at night.
Confidence has probably been a big thing for me too...... I'd not I realised how much. I'd never have admitted it anyway! Any medical professional trying to suggest I might be having a difficult time due to the shock of what's happened would probably have felt my wrath. It's back to that old feeling that I have to be strong all the time. I am strong, but I'm also becoming more accepting of the fact that I need help from people and that I need to stop overthinking everything. I think I'm learning a bit better how to just 'be'. I'm not there totally yet, but I'm definitely taking some pressure off myself. It's changeable, but I feel like I'm better learning how to relax. Doing that has increased my confidence and allowed me to do so much more. I'm walking far further than I would've been able to before, often on my own, and am far less concerned about seeing people I know or going into shops etc. And on days that I don't feel up to it, well I don't do it! It feels better to not be constantly stressed, and I know it'll help me physically as well as mentally. Wish I'd learnt how to do it years ago!! Xxx
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