I find myself often in a state of anxiety.... sometimes it's just an underlying feeling in my stomach and chest, sometimes in the morning it's a full blown panic attack. I think this is a side effect of the anti seizure medication (more or less confirmed by the effects of increasing the dose), however I really don't know for sure....... it is undoubtedly a stressful time! I've developed some coping strategies and thought they might be useful to share. You never really know who's struggling with stress and anxiety. It's often not the people you think.
So here they are, although I know I've shared some before. We're all different and something that works for me might not work for another, but worth a try. Some are more strategic ways to stay calm in general, and others are specifically for dealing with a panic attack.
1. Music - I've made a playlist on Spotify called 'positivity blast'. It's just upbeat songs that I can't help but sing and have a wee dance to.....
2. Positive self talk - I talk out loud. Usually to my husband, but sometimes just to myself. I just say that I'm in control and that I'm not allowing this to happen. I remind myself I've stopped them before and can do it again. I remind myself how far I've come and of things I've achieved. I praise myself for the little things! If I've achieved something I contact people that I know will get excited with/for me.
3. Deep breathing. A yoga teacher taught me how to breathe into my tummy so I do that now regularly through the day. If an attack comes on I try to regulate my breathing by doing this.
4. Relax - I've realised I hold myself very tensely so I make a conscious effort every so often just to relax. Drop my shoulders, unclench my jaw.
5. Fresh air - I get this every day. The past few days I've walked on the beach with my sister. Sometimes it's just to the top of my road. Doesn't matter, just fresh air (combine with 3 and 4 for best results!)
6. Looking at messages from friends. I go to sleep fairly early so when I wake up I've usually got some messages on my phone. I look at them, safe in the knowledge there will be love and support in them. They help.
7. Hand holding. I'll quite often hold a family members' hand. It helps brings me back to reality and reminds me I'm not alone.
8. My friend made me 'Tricia's portable positivity cards'. Beautiful. The size of business cards, laminated and attached together with ribbon. Each one has a hashtag on it. Something that means something to me. I can flick through them any time I feel a bit distressed.
9. Flexing hands and feet. Just reminding myself I'm in control of my body.
10. Read a funny or uplifting book. I have a few that I dip into. Sometimes I read them out loud. This morning it was 'The Twits' by Roald Dahl. Even hubby stifled a wee giggle, even though I was talking over Match of the Day..... The first chapter of The Twits about facial hair is just plain funny! I'm also quite enjoying Miranda Hart's 'Is it just me?'
11. Funny YouTube videos. My favourites at the moment are flash mobs, Billy Connolly and Kevin Bridges. Anything that'll make me laugh and also distract me from what's going on.
12. Funny photos. This doesn't really work for me as well now.... I used to use funny selfies to give me a wee boost. Now I tend to associate them with being in hospital, so I don't look at them as much. They definitely helped me through that time though.
13. Don't rush. I give myself a minute and don't pressure myself. I know I can get past it and I give myself time to do that.
14. Do something for someone else. Send a card or a message of support or thanks to someone. It's true that you feel better about yourself if you've helped someone else, in no matter how small a way. Many people reading this will know this already because you've done so many things for me!
15. Be a decent person. It's easy to be critical and to bitch about people. I've had a couple of moments where I've been mean about people.Usually because they haven't read my mind and known what I needed them to do in that second!! I knew from before that getting annoyed with someone will ultimately only harm you. I've had a couple of contacts from people I've had difficult relationships with in the past. They have given me pause for thought. Then I remembered I'm not a selfish cow! Never, ever throw an olive branch back into someone's face. Deep down you'll know you're wrong and you'll feel bad for it. I certainly would. Take it at face value. If someone is in touch with you then accept it's sincere and decent if them.
16. Spend time with family and friends. Include having good laugh into this! I find I sleep best when I've had a nice day. It usually involves a challenge of some description but also always involves time with family and/or friends. I have to careful I don't get carried away as I get tired, but it's lovely to have different conversations and not have to constantly talk about what's going on with me. I particularly dislike getting bombarded with questions. That's part of the reason for this blog! I understand people want to know and most of the time I can factually talk about it.... but sometimes it can be a bit too much for me.
So there you go. I'm also exploring the availability of complimentary therapies locally. Just to help keep me chilled out in general. I did have a friend who specialises in stress management offer me sessions, but unfortunately it's another trip to Belfast and we've enough of those to organise at the moment! I'm hoping counselling will allow me to release a lot of the more negative thoughts that can creep in too.
Plus, in a bold move, I have ditched that new anti seizure med I was given...... I've enough to deal with. I don't need to be completely insane at the same time!! The med I'm on at the moment stops the seizures. That's what it's supposed to do. I'm learning to manage the side effects. They're crap, but I think experimenting with other meds while trying to manage radio will be unbearable. All anti seizure meds are unpleasant I think. They mess with your brain..... that's what they're supposed to do. I've enough going on up there. I'll try sticking with the existing one and then hope to get off all anti seizure meds at a later date if that becomes possible...... We'll see. What I do know is that introducing another is too much. As my sister pointed out today "you know your own limits"..... yes, I do........
I've no idea if those tips will be any use to anyone, but hopefully if anyone is feeling a bit stressed or anxious, or having full blown panic attacks, then these will give them something to think about..... xxxx
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